Claire was seventeen and in her last year of school when she broke her neck and became a tetraplegic. While she and her mom were driving home, their car rolled down a hill. Claire was laying in the backseat of the car and she wasn’t wearing a seatbelt.
COMING TO TERMS
After her accident, Claire struggled with her paralysis. She admits she was in denial in the beginning, and says, “I just didn’t have any understanding of what paralysis was.” She had feelings of anger and discouragement over her accident. “I spent a lot of time thinking it would get better,” she remembers. “It didn’t occur to me until later how serious it was.” She also remembers her fear of going out in her wheelchair. She was self-conscious and scared people would judge her. She avoided making eye contact with people because she was uncomfortable being seen in her wheelchair. Claire also struggled emotionally after her injury. Although she pretended she was okay, Claire says, “inside there was a lot of anger,”
POSITIVE THINKING
Claire eventually found her positive attitude again, and became determined to thrive in her new life. She abandoned the thinking that her life was over because she was paralyzed, and realized, “The truth is, we don’t have control of our destiny, or what happens to us. And when things happen, we’re forced to look another way.”
After watching a documentary of a doctor who suffered a spinal cord injury and who was now living a good life, Claire was ready to chase her dreams again. She knew then, “If he could do it, I could do it.” While she originally thought she couldn’t gain the same opportunities she’d had before her injury, she realized she could take control of her life despite her limitations.
“I remember thinking after my injury that I would never live in a good house, or have the same opportunities that I might have had if this hadn’t had happened. I couldn’t be more wrong.”
Before her injury, Claire was an aspiring designer and she still wanted to see her dreams through. Driven by her focus and determination, Claire worked to earn her design degree and master’s degree; not even limited hand function deterred her from following her dreams. Her hard work paid off a few years later when she got a job as a graphic designer.
Claire’s ultimate goal was designing her dream home, and she worked diligently to achieve it. “I lived off two-minute noodles, and saved everything I had, then finally built my house. It was incredibly hard, but I did it.”
FORGIVENESS AND SELF-THERAPY
After her accident, Claire blamed her Mum, and the two didn’t speak for eight years. After a self-improvement course, she knew it was time to forgive her Mum and let go of her blame. “It was just an accident. It was just a moment,” Claire says, putting things in perspective.
Claire saw that her blame was a result of her loss of control over her situation and that forgiveness was possible.
“Yes, it was a tragedy, and yes it was a long journey … but we’ve learned so much about ourselves, about each other, and about humanity.”
Clair also found healing in helping others. She believes helping others is a good way to help oneself, so she volunteers in a hospital spinal ward, counseling patients with spinal injuries. She reflects on the counsel she would have given her 17-year-old-self after her accident, “I’d tell her, first of all I’m already a survivor. Outside beauty is just a state of mind, and no matter what I look like … I [can] feel better both inside and out.” Taking pride in her appearance has given Claire confidence to embrace her imperfections.
STRENGTH AFTER A SETBACK
While undergoing neck surgery to repair disintegrating vertebrae in her neck, an incorrectly-placed screw cut further into Claire’s spinal cord and caused additional damage. This further damage meant Claire could no longer work as a graphic designer – the only thing that gave her purpose. Claire fell into a deep depression, and lost sight of her promising future. She even considered assisted suicide. But her mum helped her find her strength again. She recovered from her setback by focusing on herself and on putting things back into perspective. This helped her heal and made her open again to realizing that there was another way to find purpose.
“I think you need to acknowledge that you need some help … especially if you have an injury as high as mine, that you are going to need help, and that’s okay.”
A NEW PATH
Claire started posting pictures of herself online, dressed up and revealing her stylish side. When she saw the positive feedback from viewers, she posted more pictures. Now she has nearly 10,000 followers who regularly view her images.
“I’m not a model, and I am far from perfect, but dressing up is cool, and rocking your heels is great. And finally accepting my body is liberating. We’re bringing sexy back. The image of the disabled has been reinvented.”
Claire is embracing her new freedom, and she’s showing the world that anyone can be sexy or stylish. She wants others to see that people in wheelchairs are not constantly suffering or nonsexual. “If you read an article about someone in a chair, they’re suffering. Society tends to view someone with this injury in an asexual way.”
She wants to break society of its labels and show that a wheelchair is simply a tool being used by a person, much like a car. She hopes to correct the labels and stereotypes by designing a lightweight manual chair that’s less cumbersome than traditional power wheelchairs.
“I want to design wheelchairs where you see the person first, not the chair.”
Now Claire won’t let her injury stop her from doing anything, least of all from being happy. She feels happier now that she’s accepted her experience and who she is, and she credits her accident with allowing her to change other people’s lives, “…and you can’t put a price on that.”
Because she knows time is precious, Claire resolves to make the most of her life and of her opportunities to live the life of her dreams.
“If there’s one thing I’ve learned: if I can dream it, I can make it happen. Physically I might have limitations, but I can adapt, evolve, learn from my failures, and keep dreaming.”
Watch Claire’s story below in the 30 minute documentary by AttitudeLive. And be sure to share this post to show others that even when life takes an unexpected turn, there’s still hope down the road.